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closeknit
closeknit
03 August 2008 @ 06:51 pm
fiction: nest of spiders  
author: closeknit./brownstudies
summary: Peter finds himself running out of options.
characters/pairings: Peter, mentioned Marauders and Lily, implied R/S
genre: angst
ratings/warnings: PG
word count: 226
prompt: written for Day one's prompt at [info]nest_of_spiders , with help from Thom Yorke's Clock.






Peter couldn't remember the last time he'd looked at them clear of this haze of resentment.
It was all very easy for them. James; dragged off to some palatial flat on the expensive side of the river, where Lily Evans could be sure that she'd never have to put her hand in her own pocket ever again. Remus and Sirius; comfortable in their alibi that living together was "more cost-efficient". It was all settled for him very quickly and without need for discussion. Peter would be alone, in his own flat. There was no danger of him cramping anyone's style, for they had all neatly sidestepped the pleasantries of asking him to do anything else.
If there had been an argument, it could have served as a precursor to a triumphant resolution and a return to how things were. But there was none. They just seemed to slide away from him when he wasn't looking.

"Sorry mate. We signed for somewhere a few months ago. Its a two bed, theres no room. Otherwise we'd of... .sorry, mate."

And there it was. It had officially become Moony, Padfoot, Prongs and Evans.
The way they'd so easily paired off and forgotten about him, it stung. Seven years sharing a life amounted to very little in the end.

It echoed in here when you moved.
He couldn't recall the last time he'd been alone in a room.
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Current Mood: discontent
 
42 comments | Leave a comment
 
( 42 comments — Post a new comment )
the girl in question: (actors) ian mckellen[info]latenightcuppa on August 3rd, 2008 06:44 pm (UTC)
Oh, you. This is lovely, you write Peter like no other.
Laissez-faire Mi Amour, C'est La Vie: russel flail[info]brownstudies on August 3rd, 2008 07:50 pm (UTC)
I'm finally coming around to the idea that at some point I have to BREAK HIM LIKE A TWIG.

oh, though :(
the girl in question: (actors) james mcavoy[info]latenightcuppa on August 3rd, 2008 08:09 pm (UTC)
This actually makes me think about why the fuck people automatically accepted Sirius as being the guilty one, because he already had everything going for him. Peter was the one left out in the cold, the one vulnerable to influence.
closeknit: bears[info]closeknit on August 3rd, 2008 08:15 pm (UTC)
My money would have been on Peter. But I suppose.. his finger was found, and Sirius was the only one that survived.
What I do wonder is how Remus could have been thought of as the spy when Peter was right there. I think they just accepted his lapdoggish loyalty as a given after all those years.

oh hai, i can't seem to stay logged into the same account.
the girl in question[info]latenightcuppa on August 4th, 2008 12:21 am (UTC)
I think that when everything started to fall apart, Remus probably became very withdrawn and secretive, reverting to what was easy and comfortable for him. I imagine that he wasn't allowed to talk about his missions either. Add that to how much they just assumed that Peter would always be trustworthy, and I guess I can see where it all went wrong.
Stay Frosty: [Actors] Jensen drip[info]alohachary1851 on August 3rd, 2008 07:00 pm (UTC)
oh Peter. life isn't fair.
Laissez-faire Mi Amour, C'est La Vie: stephen - hopeless[info]brownstudies on August 3rd, 2008 07:51 pm (UTC)
i know, let's become a death eater!

...yeah.
eloise! at the disco: HP - Morsmordre[info]orientation on August 3rd, 2008 08:23 pm (UTC)
Poor Peter :( I like how you've written this! Most people just write Peter as being an idiot.
closeknit: peacock - proud[info]closeknit on August 3rd, 2008 09:11 pm (UTC)
I've reached the conclusion that you can't be an idiot and still manage to betray, frame and confuse everyone around you for 15 odd years. Or sit your NEWTs. Or be an animagus.

thank you for reading!
[info]indirajames on August 3rd, 2008 09:00 pm (UTC)
People in relationships suck. Poor Peter.
m. something-or-other[info]spacefragments on August 3rd, 2008 09:16 pm (UTC)
the last two lines are disturbing, in a fantastic kind of way. they just reek of uneasiness and isolation.
closeknit: peacock - proud[info]closeknit on August 3rd, 2008 09:25 pm (UTC)
I'm kinda of the opinion that Peter wasn't terribly well, and that maybe the way he went from always having them around to Surplus To Requirements is what finally pushed him over the edge.
Thank you for reading!
rose[info]rose71 on August 4th, 2008 12:54 am (UTC)
This is fantastic. You capture the whole story of Peter's alienation so well in just a few words. And such vivid details--
where Lily Evans could be sure that she'd never have to put her hand in her own pocket ever again. Ouch, such a perfect resentful view of romance from the outside.
closeknit: dean contemplate[info]closeknit on August 4th, 2008 10:24 am (UTC)
I'm pretty sure Lily Evans ruined life for Peter as he knew it. She took away his idol and best friend and came between the Marauders; there must have been TONS of resentment there. Not enough to be the sole reason he did what he did or anything, but I bet it helped.

thank you for reading!
Cole: black sisters[info]liliths_requiem on August 4th, 2008 03:33 am (UTC)
This is going to come out entirely wrong. It isn't that this wasn't written wonderfully, but I hate Peter in this fic. Which is weird, because normally I adore Peter and think he just got confused and screwed up.
But this piece just made me hate him.
It's a compliment, really.
closeknit: winchester - twizzler[info]closeknit on August 4th, 2008 10:22 am (UTC)
eee, really? How so? I've never actually written Peter in this portion of his life before, usually I shy away from the whole betrayal thing and just hint at him not quite being on equal footing in their friendship (because I've grown to love him too much to make him do anything bad else!). I think he got screwed up, too; I don't honestly believe that anyone can turn around and ruin friends lives in cold blood, not without some serious complications and reasoning.

thank you for reading!
Lady of the Lab: emotion[sad][info]cheredemoiselle on August 4th, 2008 03:43 am (UTC)
That just hurts my heart so much.
closeknit: bears[info]closeknit on August 4th, 2008 10:35 am (UTC)
aww. If I were in the right account, I'd give you a smiley puff cupcake icon to cheer you up again.
erm... have some bears instead?

Thank you for reading, Amber!
Lady of the Lab[info]cheredemoiselle on August 4th, 2008 03:58 pm (UTC)
Cupcakes make everything better. I should make cupcakes.

Anyway, the bears work! They're cute, in a gnaw your arm off way. =)
Candace: Approval[info]butterfly269200 on August 4th, 2008 04:40 am (UTC)
Ris! Just when I think that I can muster up no feelings of sympathy for Peter here you come with this. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

I LOVED THIS FIC! YOU ARE AWESOME!

closeknit: winchester - twizzler[info]closeknit on August 4th, 2008 10:33 am (UTC)
ahahahahaha I made you feel sorry for Peeeteer.
what you need is some Sam!R/S, or some Chary!Prewetts to readdress the balance. You know, before Peter pulls you DARK SIDE.

Thank you for reading, Candace!
carlo marx: HP-- Sev up-close[info]vorpaleris on August 4th, 2008 04:42 am (UTC)
alkdsjflkasdh

I love you. And Peter. <333333333

I just kind of accept that as canon [in mah head] that Peter hates and fears being alone, y'know? Poor love. D:
closeknit: peacock - proud[info]closeknit on August 4th, 2008 10:29 am (UTC)
Yay, you liked it! :D
I think being alone would scare the crap out of him too :) Part of it must be a bit to do with the canon(?) idea that he "hides behind bigger friends", but just in general I think he'd be quite fearful of being isolated.
Oh Peter..

thank you for reading!
elizassecret[info]elizassecret on August 4th, 2008 05:02 am (UTC)
Wonderful job conveying Peter's bitterness and loneliness. Very powerful.
closeknit: peacock - proud[info]closeknit on August 4th, 2008 10:29 am (UTC)
thank you so much! :)
Vega Black[info]vegablack62 on August 4th, 2008 11:21 pm (UTC)
I'm impressed with how much you said in less than 300 words. You capture self-involved resentment very well. He has no interest in finding someone himself and he feels no satisfaction that his friends are happy. These feelings fester into betrayal.
closeknit[info]closeknit on August 6th, 2008 08:30 pm (UTC)
thanks so much :D and thank you for reading!
mindabbles: jlprs[info]mindabbles on August 5th, 2008 05:26 am (UTC)
Very nice. As others have said, you convey Peter's bitterness so thouroughly in so few words. The bit about Lily's hand in her pocket was just scathing. Well done!
closeknit: peacock - proud[info]closeknit on August 6th, 2008 08:26 pm (UTC)
thanks so much :D and thank you for reading!
Miss Nina Cat: Marauders-Fan Art 2[info]msninacat on August 5th, 2008 10:19 am (UTC)
Well, you've ventured over to the dark side with your Peter. I wish I could feel sorry for him here but I really think he should have grown up and accepted that things were gonna change. Life sucks sometimes but you gotta deal with it.
Laissez-faire Mi Amour, C'est La Vie: coffee? Fandom![info]brownstudies on August 6th, 2008 08:24 pm (UTC)
I dunno, I agree in essence, but I know it's not something I could have accepted at(barely) eighteen years old. His attitudes towards Lily and the importance of romantic relationships are incredibly childish; but finding out that you value your friends more highly than they value you, is always hard.

.....mind you, at the moment he isn't in Death Eater mode, he's just feeling a bit sorry for himself. As soon as he goes proper Dark Side.. I uh, I'm going to be having serious problems sympathising with him for anything he does.

thank you for reading Nina! :D
Miss Nina Cat: Marauders Love[info]msninacat on August 7th, 2008 07:35 am (UTC)
I think it's just my underlying bitterness at the extreme he falls to because of his jealousy towards the situation.

I still love your Peter!
meghan: marauders[info]meghan70 on August 7th, 2008 05:40 am (UTC)
very powerful fic. you can really feel peter's bitterness seeping through.
closeknit: platform 934[info]closeknit on August 17th, 2008 02:01 pm (UTC)
thanks :D and thank you for reading!
Dora Solo: [shoebox] imbeciles[info]dorasolo on August 8th, 2008 01:28 am (UTC)
Oooh that bitch, Lily Evans.
lovelylytton[info]lovelylytton on August 10th, 2008 04:26 pm (UTC)
Very well done. I almost feel sorry for Peter. Almost.
closeknit: Peter[info]closeknit on August 17th, 2008 02:02 pm (UTC)
hahaha, "almost" is quite an accomplishment for a character like Peter :D

thanks for reading!
Like a Fruit Machine[info]planetgal471 on August 13th, 2008 03:18 am (UTC)
Ouch. That's very sad, but also, very real. I mean, I am most usually (read: always) on the other side of this, and I always think, "well, they're an adult, people drift apart, they need to figure out their own life." And I do sort of agree with that. Just sitting around the issue resentfully is nothing, it solves nothing. After school often strange things happen within friendships, and you have to take it all in stride. But then, I married my high school sweetheart so I was never the one alone. I was, more often, the one wanting to be left alone by those friends who think the past is everything when there is just so much future.
closeknit: Peter[info]closeknit on August 17th, 2008 02:07 pm (UTC)
You're absolutely right; it's a difficult situation to be in, but at the end of the day, people move on. Peter just doesn't have the maturity to try to brush those feelings of resentment behind him (although as far as being dropped by your mates goes, he was right royally DROPPED). I think the thing with him is, I don't actually see him as having anyone else to turn to, as he was always so fixated on James and the boys.

thank you for reading!
Marie Phantoinette[info]cherie_morte on March 14th, 2009 06:05 pm (UTC)
Brilliant. Really helps to understand the character. Especially this line:

Seven years sharing a life amounted to very little in the end.

I gotta say it's pretty hard to make me feel bad for this character, you've done a fantastic job.
Rach[info]pirategoddess on March 14th, 2009 06:30 pm (UTC)
Found this through [info]latenightcuppa's post at [info]remusxsirius.

I play Peter at an RPG, and I really really love what you did with this. I think far too often, Pete gets the short end of the stick in fic. I don't doubt that he's a horrible person and all the stuff he did later was wrong, but he was kind of just pushed out of his own circle of friends.

Andyway, I'm talking too much. I just wanted to say that I truly enjoyed this.
Just sayin'.[info]interrobanging on March 15th, 2009 03:20 am (UTC)
Oh, Peter.
♥
 
 

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